Monday, April 9, 2012

Balloon head!

Anything can happen in Twenty / 20 cricket. Even scoring 36 runs in last over is possible. That is the reason T20 is so popular in cricket playing nations, and it won’t take too much of a time to have result. It is like a carnival show, people go to watch their home teams playing straight after the work. Support the home team, have some drinks, cheers, excitement, thrills and little dance show with few DJ tracks. Modern day entertainment after PS3 and Xbox Kinect!

IPL became food for thoughts for few neighboring countries. BPL is not British Physical Laboratories LLC as me and you identify with. It is representing Bangladesh Premier League! The latest buzz is that Pakistan also planning to have their own Premier League very soon, probably sooner than anticipated. PPL wannabe heads already hinting the possibilities of omitting Indian players from their game. The funny part is this discussion took place even before they could take decision on where to play the cricket!


I have hinted in my previous blog posts that Harbhajan Singh is a balloon head! Still if you guys are not convinced enough; just watch that match reply where Mumbai Indians played against Deccan Chargers. Bhaji was ramming towards the umpire and shouting, umpire was looking for a shield to avoid the saliva spray! At one point I thought he gonna slap the umpire like; you know he slapped someone in first edition of IPL?

Umpires make human errors, but a player can’t argue with umpire! Honestly; I was fancying Bhaji to slap the umpire, so his career would be in jeopardy. As again and again Harbhajan Singh is showing the world he is not only fit to play cricket but also any competitive game at large. Someone has to put this mentally gone case to a mental asylum as soon as possible for the best of the game cricket. He is the captain of Mumbai Indians, I am wondering how the hell an illiterate like Munaf Patel would learn discipline from the leader? Munaf can’t read, write or talk in better words. So only thing he can do is just watch somebody and try to learn from him. Unfortunately he got to look at very bad idol and that too all the time!

Virendar Sehwag is having a bad patch in his life. As soon as he got fixed his bald patch on his head all sort of bad patches start pouring at him left, right and center. His prolonged bad form successfully extended to IPL so far, been dropped from the national team, giving the chief selector Mr.Srikanth hard time to explain the media, his best buddy Gautam Ghambhir lost the vice captaincy to comparatively new comer Virat Kohli. Sehwag’s word of war with Dhoni didn’t improve the cause either. Cost him everything including his position in the team. He was probably too ignorant about the change of tide, initially the power shifted from Mumbai to Delhi, now Delhi to Chennai. Look at the opponent buddy; Chief selector Srikanth is from Chennai, BCCI secretary N.Srinivasan owns the team Chennai Super Kings, Dhoni is the captain of Chennai Super Kings, why Suresh Raina is so confident about his position in the team even after lack of form in recent international matches?, he too plays for CSK, why Bhaji is out and Ashwin is in?

Mera Bhai; tum dekha huwa book cover, poora kahani andar hai!

But one thing is for sure, nobody can mess with the HULK of Indian cricket, Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar! And everybody including foreign players are aware of his unbelievable popularity in India. Look at Greg Chappel, he has to say something about Sachin to sell his filthy biography, before coming to play IPL Brett Lee was more concerned about himself than Sachin Tendulkar by making a sweet statement about Master Blaster; consequences he may have to face from Indian crowd for blocking Sachin from scoring a run in recently concluded match in Australia could be pricy! Even Dhoni said Sachin is the ultimate batsman India can’t afford to miss, this came right after his statement about rotation policy and slow fielders. So Dhoni was hitting someone in Delhi by this statement, and he is making sure he meant particularly one player when he made that statement. Slow fielder? Ahum…. Harbhajan Singh is a real Chamcha of Sachin Tendulkar, if anybody come up with a statement against Sachin, Bhaji will be the first one to defend the little master, so what did he get out of this?, a permanent position in Mumbai Indians team, and now he became the captain of the Mumbai Indians!

100th 100 ton in international cricket is unbelievable by any stretch of imagination; Sachin achieved that feat sighting nobody nearby to break the record.  Even Sachin puffed, huffed and gasped to reach there! If not against Bangladesh he was aiming at Zimbabwe, if not Zimbabwe then new comers like UAE or Afghanistan. Luckily he got there against Bangladesh. Now he can play free cricket as some critics says, that means they too not expecting Sachin to retire in near future! As an ardent fan of Rahul Dravid said; Sachin may hang the boot and hand over the bat to his son Arjun when he is ready to play international cricket!

A media person asked Virendar Sehwag “actually Irfan Pathan is what in your team?”
After a long pause Viru answered “you know, he is a bowler, he is fast medium slow bowler who can bat a little”
“Fast, Medium or Slow… which one?” the interviewer mystified completely, the answer was nothing but a burning stare!

Adios!

Friday, April 6, 2012

IPL is back and so am I...


The inaugural function of IPL 2012 wasn’t as exciting as it used to be, less glamour or lack of glamour is evident despite of the performance of international artist gone desi Katy Perry, pure desi duo Kareena Kapoor and Priyanka Chopra. Amitab Bhachan announced his comeback after surgery in a grand way; Salman Khan flexed few muscles and called it dance! But nobody can beat Kareena Kapoor’s never die attitude, she spotted in IPL stage still trying to promote her recent box office dud Agent Vinod!



So who should be foul mouthing about the whole event at first place? Yeah, you are right. Lalit Modi has bunch of his own problems in India and now in UK, but this one wolf can’t resist screaming to the full moon. If he has enough time to watch the opening ceremony of IPL, he urgently requires a physiatrist to overlook his mental condition.

There are few adventurous advertisements come regularly between overs with warnings; these performances are performed by experts, don’t try this home. Jumping from Helicopter and jumping between the building roof tops are not done by experts; even Ramesh Pawar can do those tricks. The one who should be appreciated is the computer graphic artist who creates elevation, dam and helicopters. The point is all those actors doing impossible stunts are not real, all computer generated, but still those hopeless morons try to make an impression as those are real and done by real experts. So you can never over estimate or under estimate by outlook of a team. Look who had the last laugh when Pune Warriors lock horns with Mumbai Indians!


When everybody thought Sourav Ganguly has been restricted to commentary box and few sports news columns he came as a captain to play IPL for Pune Warriors! Man, this guy definitely got some balls! But ironically Pune Warriors is the most boring team in this year’s IPL in absence of Kochi Tuskers!

It is undenying fact that Lalit Modi brought everything to IPL, glamour, sex, advertisement, money (a lot of money for himself, and little for the whole IPL governing body and other vultures) now it seems like IPL is going in reverse mode. Too much play may kill the game.  Even cheer leaders are boring now! No cleavage show either! That South African version of IPL was the best. Glamour show in the ground as well as the gallery, to bring more attractive girls to the event, Lalit Modi introduced a beauty competition. Cunning bastard!

Kochi Tuskers came into IPL to solve India’s two biggest mysteries (I am not counting the top rated one, Sachin Tendulkar’s retirement. Currently nobody is there in India to solve this one.)

1 – Shashi Taroor’s wedding

2 – Lalit Modi’s ouster

Kochi Tuskers left the scene when they accomplished the target. Well done Kochi Tuskers, well done!

How many of you seen Harbhajan Singh getting furious with Sourav Ganguly when the ex Indian captain try to hit the spinner out of the park? I even saw a few Mumbai Indians players distracting Bhaji from the spot! Is this ass hole a real balloon head?
Time only can tell.

Adios for now.